Sunday, July 31, 2016

My Week in Workouts

I didn't have a great week in workouts. My schedule was crazy from work, which meant I was off a bit. And when I was there, nothing went right. I did not feel like I had a killer workout all week. I had a fairly good leg day, but besides that, everything was so-so. I am having a hard time getting four weight lifting sessions in each week. Running and BodyCombat make it hard to also be in the weight room four times. SO this week I skipped my Back day. I have been feeling like deadlifts are getting too heavy for me lately. And my back has been messed up a bit from it. So I am thinking of mixing things up. I am really enjoying the Chest, Shoulder and Squat routines. So I am torn. 

Saturday I had to work in the morning so that messed up my routine. I contemplated skipping the gym altogether, but I didn't have any extra days off from work to make up for it, so I also knew it would be good to get a workout in. I decided to switch things around a do a Leg Day on Sunday. I ran one mile to warm up. I am trying to work on my one mile run time. I was able to do a painful mile in ten minutes in January. But I'd like to actually build up on doing one without wanting to die. I usually start in the 11:45 range and then speed up as the end draws near. Since I started Cycle 3 of Wendler this week, I am back to doing more reps but lower weight. So no PRs for me.

Sunday I was able to take a BodyCombat class in the afternoon. I usually don't like to wait around until 1:00 to get my workout in. But we had errands and things to do in the morning, so it worked out fine. I stayed after and did my usual shoulder routine. 

Monday I had to mow the lawn. It had gotten way too long. This is another reason that it's hard to get my four lifting sessions in. Even if I wanted to skip running or Combat, something like this needs to be done. Or I have the opportunity to go for a bike ride with Dan, or it's a beautiful night and I want to do something outside. 

Tuesday is usually my rest day, but I knew I was out for Wednesday and Thursday. So I went straight from work and got it done and met Dan for dinner still. I had a goal to watch TV while running two miles on slowly. But I couldn't get the wifi to work in the building. Which means I couldn't get hulu to work. Which means I had no show to watch. Which meant I never would have made it two miles. So after walking for five minutes I went and did my Chest and Tricep weights. Then I did the elliptical for 20 minutes and called it a day. My calorie burn was sad. But I got the weights done. 

Wednesday was my last fun day with Sammie and Jennifer and Sadie. We did some hiking and walking at a nature center. It wasn't really a workout, although Sammie acted like I made her walk 100 miles through the dessert.

Thursday I worked an eleven hour day. It was my last summer reading event: volunteer party. I ate too much pizza and too many oreos. But those kids are just the greatest part of my job and letting them nail me with water balloons even on a slightly chilly evening, is my favorite program of the year. 

Friday morning I was up early to run with Tracy. We are not getting any faster. In fact, I don't think we've improved at all this summer. But I do actually enjoy meeting her. And it's a great way to burn through some calories. 

Wednesday, July 27, 2016

Mini Cut: Week 2

Lowest Weight: 9 pounds
Average Weight: 10.1 pounds

Two weeks in and I am getting frustrated. More at myself. Because it's only been two weeks and I am not being consistent. Mostly, because I want to eat all the food. And celebrate the summer. And I would rather do that then weigh less I guess. But then I get on the scale the next morning and don't want to celebrate summer, and want to fit in to my smaller jeans instead!

But everything is up this week. My lowest weight is up a pound. My average weight is up .6 pounds and my Wednesday to Wednesday weigh in was up a pound. Nothing good has come out of this week.

So I have no choice but to start fresh and hope work for better things next week.

I need to get my head in the game.

I don't want to start cutting more numbers. It's not like eating 1900 calories should leave me hungry. But I actually have to hit those every day. I need to make sure social eating doesn't wreck havoc on my goals. And I need to stop grazing on candy and actually measure out what I want to eat.

So I am setting some goals for this week:

1. No untracked bites.
2. Hit my numbers every day.

And if I do all that and my weight continues to go up. Then I can be frustrated.

Monday, July 25, 2016

Weekend Habits

I have created some bad weekend habits, and I realize this has probably been going on for a while.

I am not hitting my macros.

In the beginning, I had so many calories that I could just eat whatever I wanted on the weekends and not worry about going over. But now, I can't do that. But it's a habit, and that kind of thing is hard to change.

Plus, I don't seem to care if I hit my protein number. Which is the whole reason you can eat that many calories. Because you're eating what your body needs to function, not just unlimited donuts. Or in my case tortilla chips.

Friday night, I had high hopes of just meeting Dan at home and having a relaxing night without eating out. We had been out so many times last week. But when I called, he wanted to try this Asian Fusion place that I had mentioned in passing the week before. He never has ideas. And I couldn't just say no. So we ended up having Chinese food. It was okay, but we won't go back. I tracked it, and I stayed under my calories but I didn't hit my protein.

Saturday started out well. I had planned most of my day and even had room left for a treat to finish up. We went to a movie with some friends and then we had plans to go to Cliffs for drinks. I usually have no trouble passing there. I drink diet soda and sit back and enjoy the company. But then they decided we should walk across the parking lot to Chevy's. A tex-mex type restaurant. We order chips and queso and guacamole. I had to partake. And then I got a margarita. Just a small one. That wasn't completely sugar laden. According to their website it was only 183 calories. It also wasn't that good, nor worth it! I was still over my daily calories by almost 500 calories.

Which might not have been as bad when I was eating 2375 calories. But when I am trying to eat only 1900, it's a problem.  Or maybe it's the other way around. Eating 2400 calories isn't so bad since I was just eating that regularly a couple of weeks ago. And I still didn't quite hit my protein.

Sunday, I didn't eat a lot. But I did have a donut with Dan for breakfast. And then I had nachos for dinner. I didn't have much between, which kept me around 1700 calories. But not of lean proteins.

But none of this calorie counting is the point. I am supposed to be hitting that 1900 every day with the right mix of carbs and fats to keep me building (or maintaining) muscle mass, maintaining my energy level and still losing fat.

And I am not.

And if I don't get more consistent, then I might as well be eating 2300 calories every day.

Friday, July 22, 2016

My Week in Workouts

I had a very good week in workouts. But I have it down to such a planned routine right now that I could truly just copy and paste from last week. I completed week #3 in my lifting plan. Next week (4) is a deload week and I am thinking I might do a big deload and spend more time doing cardio. But then I get bored of cardio and just want to lift some weights. So maybe not.

Saturday I started off with a BodyCombat class. It was a sub teacher, and that's never as good, but it's always a good class. We're still in the new release week. But I think the music and moves are pretty good on this one. Then I lifted shoulders and headed home. Also, I accidentally stopped my heartrate monitor checking on it after class.

Sunday I dropped Dan off at work, had a great Leg Day and then went out to swim with Samantha. I ran a mile to warm up and then hopped on the squat rack. I set a new PR for squatting today: 146x6. I have never even attempted 145 pounds, so to do it 6 times was awesome. Then just as I can't wait to try even more next week, it's deload week. If I start the whole cycle over again, I will start at a lower weight and build up again. I understand the logic, but I just want to see the numbers grow!

Monday, I ran a mile, did the bench press, ran another mile, did my accessory work and then walked a mile. It was a good way for me to get some mileage in. Plus I watched a whole TV show in that time. It kept my heart up and probably helped me burn more calories than a normal chest and tricep day.

Tuesday was my rest day.

Wednesday was my second rest day. But I did catch Samantha jumping off the side of the pool, like 500 times, so that probably worked something. But I did it in the refreshing chill of the water. I wish I could swim laps.

Thursday I was pretty exhausted after work. I didn't have enough energy to do sprints. So I allowed myself to do steady state cardio on the elliptical machine. I knew I wasn't burning a ton of calories, but I was watching TV and not caring. When I got off the machine I was super dizzy. It was hot in the gym. I had been outside for work at least 30 minutes that day. I don't know what was going on. I sat in the locker room for a few minutes and then I went and did deadlifts. That's all I had in me. No energy for the bicep and back accessories. When I checked on my heartrate monitor, it had stopped after 18 minutes. I didn't even look at it then. I guess neither of us finished our workout that day.

Friday morning I met Tracy. It was miserably hot out already. We had discussed skipping, since our city was under a heat advisory, meaning don't be outside if you don't have to. But we decided we would just take it easy, walk when we needed to, and still get a good workout in. Honestly, it was hotter than it's been before, but the humidity was lower (just 70% this week, 90% last week) and there was a good breeze for half of it. That makes a big difference. Tracy is still having problems and needed to walk a bunch. She even wanted to turn around after a mile, but I pushed us to the 1.5 mark. Then you have no option but to make it back home. I am really proud of us that we went. 

I have to work on Satruday morning and that's going to throw a wrench in my plans? Will I BodyCombat a different day? Will I skip the deload week because I just don't understand the point? Will I try something new altogether. Stay tuned...

Wednesday, July 20, 2016

Mini Cut: Week 1

Lowest Weight: 8 pounds
Average Weight: 9.5 pounds

I am one week into my mini cut. I am calling it that, because I might only keep it up for four weeks. I am sticking with the 1900 calories, even though I know I went a tiny bit over on Saturday and Sunday I stayed under my calories but messed up my carbs and fats.

My weigh-in numbers are a bit deceiving this week. My average weight is actually up 0.2 pounds and my lowest weight is up 0.6 pounds since my last weigh-in report (9 days ago.) But that's the strange thing about averages, since it was high to start, it skews the data. The important news is that my weight is coming down. And if I had done a weigh in last Tuesday, when I started this cut, that number would have been 11.8 pounds and today I was 8.6 pounds. So I would have come on here and said I lost 3.2 pounds this week.

Which is a lot more motivating.

But I really think this average thing helps you see the big picture. Because all those jumps up and down I used to have were more often than not, depressing. Even though the ultimate trend line would have shown a decline. Because I am definitely less weight than I was two years ago. It just doesn't work as linearly as I would like it to!

So my hope now is that the average weight keeps going down every week for the next three weeks. In an ideal world, it would be 7.5, 5.5, 3.5! Then Dan and I are going on vacation. Most likely it will just be a staycation. And I am okay with that. I happen to like those better. Time away from work but without the stress of packing. And even a quick weekend trip looks like it will cost $1000 just for travel and lodging. Do you know what we can do with $1000 at home? A lot!

Depending on my motivation and how well this is working, I may try to stay at that 1900 calories for those five days. Or I might try to enjoy my vacation and not track. It's not like tracking and eating 1900 calories is hard. It's just that you can't have nachos and cheesecake all the time. And honestly, as yummy as that sounds, I would probably enjoy my vacation more if I wasn't loaded down with that stuff. I also hope we'll do a lot of active things together. Maybe some long walks or biking. And lots of swimming.

I am getting ahead of myself though. This week wasn't completely easy-peazy. It's hard to cut calories, no matter how motivated you are. I have trained myself to eat bigger breakfasts and lunches and snacks. So now if I don't monitor them a bit, I am out of calories for dinner. And several nights I get no bedtime snack. Knowing I get a yummy snack at then end of the day keeps me happy enough to turn down all the other treats I am offered. It has been super easy to hit my protein since I cut that by 20 grams this week. That's a plus. Sometimes I am halving my meat servings at dinner. Which is fine. And I am often hungry. Which is fine too.

Tuesday, July 19, 2016

The First Weekend

Even though 1900 calories is still a lot of food. And even though I was eating just 1660 last February. And even though I thought that I was in a place where I really wanted to eat less food and get all this fluff off of me. This was a tough weekend.

I am really used to being able to eat pretty much anything I want. I have cut my calories by 375. That's not a ton in the big scheme of things. But it's the difference between having to choose between fries or dessert. It's the difference between eating the breadsticks or not. It's the difference between having candy with Sammie or skipping out on all the fun.

On a normal Tuesday, it's not hard. It seems like a lot to eat still. And at the end of the day, I can still choose to have small bowl of ice cream or an apple with peanut butter.

But this weekend proved to be more difficult.

And all of my troubles stem from my social life.

Dan has been mentioning lately that he doesn't get to spend much time with Samantha this summer. I have seen her a lot at the library and my Wednesday afternoons I take off to spend with her. But he misses out. So we asked if we could come out and spend Saturday evening with her.

We relaxed in hammocks together. 

We went exploring! She still absolutely loves that. And so does Dan. So I tag along. And try not to touch anything gross or get any ticks on me, or damage my shoes. And then we climb this tree. And it is absolutely her favorite thing on the planet. And we make her so happy. 

We also went out to dinner. And I had planned my grilled chicken and half a baked potato perfectly. But I don't think about the chips I eat off of her plate. Or the onion rings I have to bite to get the onions out for her!

Then we come back to her place and need to raid the candy bowl, because that's what we do. I tried to just have a bite because I was out of calories. But that untracked bite put me over. 

Sadie has been awake much more lately. And she's so cute. 

Sunday we had plans to swim in Sammie's kiddie pool. I made myself workout and get a healthy lunch to take out there. So I didn't just eat all the chips they have around their house. By the time I arrived, clouds had moved in and thunder started. We played in the water for a bit, but without the sun, it was just too cold for me. Then we jumped on the trampoline in our wet swimsuits, which was actually the most fun thing. Hearing her giggle uncontrollably at the bouncing and slipping reminds me of how simple perfection can be. Heaven will be jumping on the trampoline with my Sammie.

When the lightning started, I convinced her to come inside and have a snack. I had a single serving of these "healthy" sunflower cookies. We ended up having a movie day inside. 

I love that she loves selfies. Almost as much as she loves exploring!

I can get Sadie to smile every time I see her now. She's such a happy baby. This little life is so full of possibility. I wonder if she'll love me as much as Samantha does... and what this will do to our lives!

Sunday night I had dinner with Erin at a relatively healthy place. I had grilled shrimp tacos. I knew I had enough carbs for the flour shells, because I ate a salad for lunch. But then Erin suggested we visit the ice cream store across the street. I don't want to live my life saying no. I think I stayed under my calories, but I know my carbs and fats were higher than they should be. 

That made me start thinking about having some kind of cheat day. Or carb cycling. I could limit myself to 1800 calories all week if that meant on Saturday or Sunday I could have an extra 200-300 calorie treat. 

Or I could just get used to eating lower calorie again for a while. It only seems low because I was eating so much food before. And I don't have to be perfect. As I have said before, living life is more important. I never want to miss an chance to hang out with any of my girls just because I want to lose three pounds!

Monday, July 18, 2016

Recap of my First Reverse Diet

Now that I am a week out from my first Reverse Diet, I am ready to sit back and analyze it. I think charts are so useful for something like this. Also I am a nerd. I have never tracked my weight like this, so I have very little to compare it to. I am totally going to do it this way from here on out, because it is so useful.

Here's some things I notice just from this 20 point graph:

  • You can easily see which weeks were "womanly time!" Week 3, 7, 11, 15, 19. I always spikes that week and then returns down. Which it probably would have done again on week 20, but I wasn't about to stick around and find out. 
  • Week 4 was my lowest average weight (at just 3 pounds from my goal.) and I was eating 1840 calories.
  • Week 12 was my last really good week. And that was very close to the lowest I had been the entire time (3.2 pounds from goal.) I was eating 2065 calories that week.
  • I would say things got worse from week 12 on. Slowly my weight climbs up a pound almost every week from there on out. From week 12 to 19 I gained six pounds. 
  • But week 16 really throws a wrench in there. It plummets down two pounds from the week before leading me to think things are just fine. 
  • This leads me to believe that my current TDEE is around 2100 calories. And if I continued to eat that every day for the rest of my life I would maintain my weight. 
I have learned so much from this process. So much that I can hardly put it into words.
  • By tracking my weight daily and so precisely, I now understand more than ever what true weight gain is. And when I say weight gain I mean actual fat gain, but what I see on the scale is just water displacement. This is the most liberating things. And I probably could have learned that just from keeping better records all these years, but I didn't.
  • My TDEE isn't as high as it should be. I really think I could keep at this process and get it up to 2300. But I am too scared to gain too much weight. I has to be done in cycles. Push the boundaries, lose some fluff, try to push higher. And I will!
  • I didn't need to go as slow as I did at the beginning. I should have gone slower at the end. And faster at the beginning. Yes, my scale might have jumped up a bit more at the beginning, but it would have balanced out in the middle. 
  • Life happens. My grandmother, my most precious family member, passed away during week 17. If that life stress doesn't mess with something, than I know nothing. I didn't track perfectly that week. And that might have thrown the whole last few weeks off. Which is why I will do it again. But life will happen again and again and I am not doing science in a vacuum. As much as I wish I was. 
  • Honestly, I hardly noticed a change in my energy levels. This might be because I pushed my carbs up so slowly. It might be because about the time my carbs starting getting higher, work started getting crazier. I am pretty tired this week, but I haven't been sleeping eight hours per night. I should really track my sleep in an equally important yet completely different spreadsheet. And when I find out the two are directly related, I will have solved all the worlds obesity problems. 
  • I mean, isn't it really interesting that I could eat 500 more calories and my weight didn't change. Isn't the whole process just outstanding? 
  • I hope this cut follows those rules just as well and I come back here in several weeks with a chart that shows just as many useful things!

Friday, July 15, 2016

My Week in Workouts

I had a perfectly average week of workouts. I am kind of stuck in a rut right now, but that's okay. It's nice to have a routine that I can stick to. I burned almost 2400 calories, got all my weight lifting sessions in, two rest days and some cardio!

Saturday I started with the launch of the next BodyCombat release. It was pretty good. Lately they have been loving adding push-ups to the middle of tracks. I kind of hate that. They're too fast and form is no good. I try to do them slower than the beat and just focus on good form. That could have been why the shoulder workout I did afterward seemed so difficult. But it could also be that I am really pushing up those weights.

Sunday I was lazy and didn't want to get to the gym at all. But I finally made myself, knowing that everything would be better if I went. I didn't have the energy to run, so I walked hills and did legs. I did seven reps of 135 pounds! The most reps I have ever done at that weight. Next week I set a new weight PR!

Monday I ran 15 sprints (at 8.0 - though I need to work on increasing those) and then did chest and triceps. I felt incredibly strong at both my weights and my runs.

Tuesday and Wednesday were my rest days. I hate taking them in a row, but sometimes that's how it goes. I haven't been sleeping enough and have been extremely tired. Wednesday I just fell asleep for an hour on my couch. I later thought, is it my reduced carbs that are making me so tired? But more likely, it's just not enough sleep.

Thursday I went to the gym straight from work so there would be no sitting down to watch TV. I ran sprints again. This time starting at 7.8 and working up to 8.2. I felt like I was flying. By thighs were really tired like I had done something productive during the last few days. I haven't. Unless you count having a fashion show at Target with Sammie! Then it was time for Back and Biceps. These are not my favorite parts to work, but last week my back was so sore from this workout. And I mean sore in a good way.

Friday morning I was up to run with Tracy again. It was cooler out this morning. Still super humid, but the lower temps helped. We did the whole 5k. I felt like our walk breaks were pretty minimal. We weren't quite at our fastest, but only five seconds slower. Remember when I ran three miles in 33 minutes, not too long ago?

Thursday, July 14, 2016

Am I Skinny Yet?

I have completed two days of my new cutting macros. It hasn't been hard. But the scale hasn't moved yet. Somehow I convinced myself that my weight would just plummet its way back down ten pounds. 

I also have a false sense of how long I've been doing this. After I got off the scale this morning and had this frustrated why am I still ten pounds up moment, I thought, it's already been like... Oh, two days. 

Yeah, two days is probably not enough to start getting worried. 

So even though it feels like it's been forever, it hasn't been difficult sticking with lower numbers. I even had a baby McFlurry yesterday with Jennifer and Sammie. Life's not bad if you can eat ice cream and lose weight. 

Now I'm just waiting for the weight loss part. Because I know it has to be coming eventually. Maybe tomorrow!!!

Tuesday, July 12, 2016

Reverse Diet: Week 19

Average Weight: 9.3 pounds
Lowest Weight: 7.4 pounds

Just last week I said "stay the course!" I wanted to see how high I could go. But for a third week in a row, I used these 2275 macros and my weight jumped even higher than the 10 pound mark. Yes, this is the week of my period. So I am always a pound or two higher. But I never wanted to see that ten, let alone the twelve I saw this week. The twelve was the fluke, not the ten. And even though I wanted to see if I could get to 2400 calories, it is not going to happen this time.

It is time to slash my calories. I am going to do a mini-cut. Just four weeks. Four weeks hardly sounds like enough time to do anything, but I am going on vacation in four weeks! I also think it's enough time to get back to where I started.

I am still hopeful that two to three pounds is just retaining water. And then a couple of pounds will come off when I start eating less carbs.

The goal of all of this was to reset my "set point" or how many calories my body is burning daily. Slow and steady I think I pushed it up to about 2250. I know I can maintain on 2200! But now I want to cut some of that off and am hoping that when I do, I actually start losing weight. Real weight. Fat.

So I am going to cut down to 1900 calories. 140 p/182c/68f. It's still 240 calories more than I was cutting on (and losing nothing) in February. It's still a good amount of calories.

After the four weeks are over, I don't know what I will do.

Reverse again? Faster? Trying to get even higher?

Reverse a little to see if I can continue losing at 2000 calories.

Keep going because I am loving it and lower than I have ever been?

Keep cutting because nothing is moving still?

The first 12-16 weeks things really went scientifically well for me. Here's hoping that it actually worked and my metabolism is fired up!

Also I am moving my weigh-in day to Wednesday! Because Weigh-in Wednesday was always better!

Saturday, July 9, 2016

Two Year Macro-versary

Two years ago, on July 7th 2014, I began counting macros. And I have stuck with it now for two years. I have had several days where I didn't hit my numbers. I have taken a week or two off for vacations. And I have certainly guessed a fair share of the macros I have eaten. But overall, I have been very consistent in those two years.

And I have lost 24 pounds from that initial week. I am done two jeans sizes.

Of course, right now I am on a new journey: eating at maintenance to attempt to heal a slow metabolism. And this process has caused my weight to go up a little more than I would like. But I think that will come down fairly soon.

Overall, I love it. I like that I can still eat what I want. I like believe the science behind it. For years, nobody could tell me scientifically what I should be eating. It has completely changed the way I think of calories and weight loss (I mean fat loss!) and exercise.

No more spending hours at the gym trying to work off all the damaged I did this weekend. No more going to bed hungry and starving myself.

At the beginning I had to plan out my days and sit and calculate. Now it's second nature and I rarely have to think about what I am eating. I do have a time at the end of the day where I see what's left and figure out something that fits. But I usually know exactly what it will be: milk, peanut butter, cookie dough, lunch meat. I know what types of things to order in a restaurant. And I know exactly what to do if I have a high carb lunch.

Sometimes my fit sisters have discussions about eating intuitively and not tracking. And they say they can't do this forever. But I think I can. And I actually think I will need to. It doesn't bother me. Listing everything I eat today is no different than listing everything I want to get done at work, or all my house projects. I like to see things written down.

Now I am looking forward to what happens after this reverse diet. My hope is that I can cut on a lot higher of calories than I have in the past. I started two years ago at 1794. But as I lost weight, it was just 1660 in February. I am hoping that I can cut this time somewhere in the 1800s, or maybe ever 1900!

Ask me in September. I am either going to be frustrated, or love macro-tracking even more!

Friday, July 8, 2016

My Week in Workouts

I had a fairly decent week as far as workouts go. I had a long weekend (4 days!) and that helped me get some things in that I normally wouldn't have time for. I re-started Cycle Two of my Wendler 5/3/1 program. I was just off last week. And although I didn't feel great about it this week, I at least did it. At the required weights. I burned over 3000 calories (exact amount unknown, my heartrate battery died this week) and did six workouts.

And the scale is still going up. But that's an unrelated post!

Saturday I started my four day weekend with my beloved BodyCombat class and followed it up with Shoulders. As I said, I started over on my Wendler program. After the first cycle, you're supposed to add five pounds to your one rep max and recalculate. But it seems like I am just adding five pounds to everything I did the first cycle. Since it seemed pretty easy the first time around, this didn't sound like too much. But it all seemed hard when I did it.

Sunday, I ran one mile and then I worked my legs. I do love doing squats. I always forget how strong I feel. Instead I dread it. But once it's over, I feel pretty buff. Then I had wanted to run another mile but I was pretty tired, so I just walked instead.

Monday was the holiday, which sounds great, but we had lunch plans, which means I had to be up early to workout. Or kind of early. And it also meant I couldn't do the special BodyCombat class and follow up with weights. So instead I started with a quick walk, then did my chest and triceps and then ran across the gym to make it to the first half of the Combat class. But the class before was behind and I only got to attend about 20 minute of it. Plus, my heartrate monitor wouldn't connect. So I had a hodgepodge of a workout but I got my weights in and it was something. I guessed 500 calories for it.

Tuesday I had the day off, but I had plans at ten o'clock. I dropped Dan off at work at nine and then went for a run on the trail by his library. I don't love that trail. It was outrageously hot. I haven't run  alone in a long time. I have lost my speed and my endurance. I was dripping with sweat and it was in my eyes and I had to run with them closed some. And that trail is busy. It is by an office building that must mandate you have walking breaks. Dressy people are all over it. I did over a mile and turned a round and then around again and again and when I got to 40 minutes I figured that was good enough. The calories are all that matter.

Wednesday was my only true rest day. And I worked 11 hours. And it was my half-birthday. So after work, Dan took my out for Coldstone ice cream. And it fit, and I was a happy girl.

Thursday I mowed the lawn. It was so muggy and hot and miserable out. I had to take a break to fill up with gas, so I let myself sit down and make a phone call and cool off. But I didn't think to pause my heartrate monitor. So my data is a bit skewed. It usually only takes about an hour to mow everything.

Friday morning I was up early to run with Tracy. But because of a huge rainstorm we had, our underpass was a mud-pit. She wanted to turn around (and I agreed) but unlike me, she won't just run back and forth on the same path. So once we got back to our cars, she was done. And it was less than two miles. Luckily, I had enough time to drive to the gym, get my back and bicep work in and take a few felx breaks! My biceps are coming along!

And now I am ready to do it all again next week.

Wednesday, July 6, 2016

Reverse Diet: Week 18

Average Weight: 7.7 pounds
Lowest Weight: 7.2
Macros Breakdown: 2270 calories = 160p/231c/79f

Things are not looking good. They started looking grim during the week of my grandma's funeral. I had several untracked, or unhit days. But I hit my numbers all week last week and they didn't go down. I can't say they really went up, they hovered around the 7-8 range both weeks. But I was hopeful that the extra fluff or water would evaporate off. Turns out I may have gained a pound or three from that week. Which doesn't make real sense.

But it has me really worried. 

I am currently eating about 13 times my body weight.  Maybe this is the end. But it shouldn't be. I should be able to get up to 14 or even 15 times my weight. 

I am holding steady for another week. But here is what confuses me the most: It's not that exact. So let's say that I am eating 30 more calories than I "should be". That's 210 calories extra I am eating per week. If weight was linear and worked perfectly, I wouldn't gain a pound for 16 weeks. So I could keep going for a long time before I would know I was done. But it's not perfect and doesn't work like that. Even more reason to never know when I am done.

So then I have to pick an arbitrary number that I am just going to force myself to get to. Which is probably about 2400. I hover between just powering through. I mean, if I actually stick to my numbers, what's the most I can gain. Even if I am 100 calories over, I can only gain a pound in 35 days. Kinda!

But I am freaking out about my scale. It was six pounds higher today than when I stared eighteen weeks ago. And that makes me what to pull the plug and start eating 1300 calories tomorrow. But then what was it all for? My goal for June was to stay the course and not worry about it. And some of that has to be fluff from the holiday and extra sodium from chips and I have not been consistent. 

I can be happy seven pounds from goal. I only have about five weeks left before I was planning to do a late summer cut anyway. I just don't want it to keep creeping up. But I am not eating where I should be. So here's my plan unless I somehow go above that 10 pound mark:

Week 19 (July 4th): 2270 calories = 160p/231c/79f
Week 20 (July 11th): 2330 calories = 160p/238c/82f
Week 21 (July 18th): 2380 calories = 160p/246c/84f
Week 22 (July 25th): 2400 calories = 160p/251c/84f
Week 23 (August 1st): 2400 calories - maintain!
Week 24 (August 8th): 2400 calories - maintain!

August 17th, begin on cutting macros. Which hopefully will be about 1900 calories! 

Gah! it's just stressful and I don't have a lot of guidance. And it worked so perfectly at the beginning. I just hope it's all worth it!

Friday, July 1, 2016

My Week in Workouts

Here's a two week recap for you, since I missed blogging last week. I had a lot of days off of work, and I made sure to get to the gym almost every day. I did take two rest days, but made sure they fell on my busiest of family days. I finished up my first cycle of the Wendler program and (kinda) started the second one. I think I am liking it quite a bit.

Saturday - I did just half of a BodyCombat class to start my day. It was really warm in that room, I had forgotten my water bottle, and maybe family stress was taking a toll on me. I just couldn't do the second half. That's okay though, it was a good warm up to my Chest and Tricep day.

Sunday - My grandmother died on Father's Day. Some time early in the morning. When the nurses went to check on her at 5 AM, she was already gone. My mom called me early to let me know. But I was already up and about to leave town for Father's Day. We went to lunch and a movie with my dad. Then we went over to my Aunt's when we arrived back in town to spend the evening with my mom's family. That's all that was important that day.

Monday - I was sad and tired and I finally dragged myself to the gym before the after work crowd showed up. I wanted to run two miles, doing run/walk intervals. A song came on my earphones and it reminded me a lot of my grandma. It brought tears to my eyes. I wanted to go home and sleep. But instead I ran faster. And listened on repeat. I ran .10 mile and then walked .10 mile. Even though I felt like I was sprinting on those 6.5 mph intervals, It took me longer than just running two slowly. Followed up with Deadlift day.

Tuesday - I began my last week of the Wendler 5/3/1 program. Deload week. Everything gets a bit easier. Since I was behind on my schedule, I decided to put shoulders and legs together. I warmed up with a one mile jog.

Wednesday was the viewing and rosary. We needed to leave town by 2;00 so I knew I needed to get a workout in before then. I didn't feel like running, so I did thirty minutes of hills. It got my heartrate up quite a bit. Then I did Chest and Triceps. Everything feels so easy on deload week. But I just feel like I am going through the motions.

Thursday was the funeral and I was up at 6, but not for a workout. Just to get ready and drive out to Bellwood, where the funeral was. We arrived home at 5:00 and I took an hour nap on my mom's basement couch. Then we headed out to dinner with the family and didn't get back to our house until 10PM.

Friday I was happy to have Tracy waiting for me at 6:30 to run. It was hot and humid and we still did three miles and shaved another 30 seconds off from the week before. Slow and steady. Then I took naps that day. And went out to Jennifer's and held my baby Sadie and swung on the hammock with my Sammie. Because I needed to know what was right in the world.

Saturday I thought things would be looking up. I was excited to start my next cycle of Wendler. I did a great BodyCombat class. Our pregnant instructor has finally quit for a while. She must be at least 7 months pregnant. But then I just had a hard time with the weights. I was so tired. I was dragging. I felt weaker than I had in a long time. I don't know what was happening.

Sunday I needed another Rest day. I was exhausted. I took three naps. Lots of long and stressful days. I actually read somewhere this week that taking naps is one way your body deals with grief. Maybe that's what was going on.

Monday, Dan and I had our last day off of work and I wanted us to do something together. I set my alarm to get up early and hit the gym, but then I went back to sleep. We decided to go for a bike ride as our activity. It was really hot. And at one point I was delirious from heat. Half way through my knee started hurting (and old biking injury) and it was tough to make it back.

I knew I needed to make it to the gym on Tuesday night. But again, it was a failure. Legs should have been on the schedule, but my knee hurt from that bike ride. I wanted to try to run/walk at faster intervals than last week, but after the first mile I was too exhausted. My stomach was kind of upset and grumbly. I decided to swap Chest day. But I felt super weak on the bench press and after that I could not get myself to do the accessory work. I decided to walk ten more minutes as I watched TV. But it wasn't a stellar workout.

Wednesday was my second rest day for this week. I had lots of social plans. My friend Gretchen is back, visiting from Australia! I haven't seen her for over six years. So I need to make time for that.

Thursday I meant to go home and now my yard. But I was so exhausted I couldn't even stay awake at work. I took a quick nap at home and just couldn't get any energy the rest of the night. 

Friday, Tracy was ready for me at 6:30. I love having someone to meet. She has been running on Wednesday mornings too. I am so tempted to tell her I'll meet her, but I just don't want to make the commitment. It was beautiful weather this morning. I could have kept going for another thirty minutes. Oddly, this was the firmest week we didn't decrease our time. I did make her run the whole first mile though.